I hereby violate every dictum and realm of integrity of the blogosphere by posting the following, completely and totally ripped of from Toby Harndon of the London Telegraph - since I have given credit I ease my conscience. But this amateur statesmanship continuously demonstrated by Obama's staff is so Junior High - I do hope that someone brought a US Region 1 DVD player so Barack and Gordon can sit around and watch the DVDs our ever-so-thoughtful President dutifully gave to The Prime Minister of England upon his visit to The Colonies. Oh, and I do pray the staffer with the 7th grade gifting skills remembered to bring a converter. Now on to the most recent embarrasment:
So here's what the White House is telling American reporters - and
by extension the American people - about Britain. It's laid out in an
inch-thick "press kit", with the Seal of the President of the United
States emblazoned on the cover, handed out to each of us on board the
White House press charter en route from Andrews Air Force Base outside Washington to Stansted.
The United Kingdom, we are told, is "slightly smaller than Oregon".
As for the the British climate, it is "generally mild and temperate"
and "subject to frequent changes but few extremes of temperature". A
"group of islands close to continental Europe", Britain has been
"subject to many invasions and migrations".
We're taken through the Roman invasion ("brought more active
contacts with the rest of Europe"), the Norman invasion (led to "active
involvement in European affairs...for several hundred years") and
various travails with the Welsh, Scots and Irish before the British
empire reached its zenith in Victorian times.
Then it all started to go wrong. "The losses and destruction of
World War I, the depression of the 1930s, and decades of relatively
slow growth eroded the United Kingdom's preeminent international
position of the previous century".
Those fretting about the demise of the term "special relationship"
might not be reassured by this briefing book. There's talk of a "strong
bilateral relationship", of the UK being "one of the United States'
closest allies" and of "close coordination" and "bilateral cooperation"
between two countries who "continually consult on foreign policy".
Everything except "special".
After the country sections, we're introduced the personalities, with
information mainly culled from their websites. Queen Elizabeth
"enrolled as a girl Guide when she was eleven, and later became a Sea
Ranger", we are informed. During the war she "put on pantomimes with
the children of members of staff for the enjoyment of her family and
employees of the Royal Household".
Gordon Brown's entry reads a little like one of those awful Christmas round robins.
Young Gordon, we are told repeatedly, was very, very clever. He "did
well a school from an early age" and then "excelled at sport and joined
in every aspect of school life, quickly becoming popular".
He "took his exams a year ahead of his contemporaries" and "went on
to University at the age of 15", where he edited the student newspaper
"in a prize-winning year" and won "a First Class Honours degree and a
number of prizes for his studies".
David Cameron seems to be auditioning for the role of British Barack in advance of his big meeting with the President tomorrow (in the Yellow Room at Winfield House),
stating he was elected Conservative leader with a "mandate to change
the party and change the country" and "believes there is urgent need
for change".
Since her presidential bid, Hillary Clinton, now Secretary of State,
has scaled down her claims of being "instrumental" in bringing peace to
Northern Ireland. All we get on the Emerald Isle is a modest: "With
Secretary of State Madeleine K. Albright, Secretary Clinton worked to
launch the government's Vital Voices Democracy Initiative."
The former New York senator skips quickly over her defeat in the
battle for the Democratic nomination. "In 2006, Senator Clinton won
reelection to the Senate, and in 2007 she began her historic campaign
for president," her biography reads. "In 2008, she campaigned for the
election of Barack Obama and Joe Biden."
For those who might bristle at the "slightly smaller than Oregon" description of Britain (which seems to originate from the CIA World Factbook),
US geographical comparisons are also included in the other country
profiles prepared by the State Department's Bureau of European and
Eurasian Affairs.
Germany - a "reliable US ally" since 9/11 - is "about the size of
Montana" while the Czech Republic "about the size of Virginia".
We are informed that France is "America's oldest ally" and was
"instrumental in helping Britain's American colonies establish
independence" and more recently has been "a close partner with the US
in the war on terror".
It is the largest country in Europe. But only "about four-fifths the size of Texas".
Oregon, by the way, has a population of 3.7 million while the population of the UK is more than 60 million.